In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Gut Feeling.”
So I find it mildly ironic that the Daily Post on here is about following your gut and my day four December Photo Challenge Quote on Instagram (which I did today because I slack on those things sometimes) was about following your gut. It all came about from Facebook suggesting I add someone I have no friends in common with nor have I ever contacted them from my phone. In fact, I would much rather never see this person again in my life. If I could commit murder and get away with it, I’d likely kill this person. And that’s saying a lot because I’m generally a pretty chill person.
But either way… I could do without this person’s existence. And without going into too much detail about the situation and why I’d rather not know this person was still alive, let’s just say that my gut helped me avoid something that could have been way worse than it was. I just wish I had listened to it sooner. Thankfully, however, that wasn’t the last time I listened to my instincts.
I’m a pretty analytical person by nature. If something doesn’t make logical sense, I sometimes have a hard time grasping the concept of it. The best example of that I can give you is the inability to be a decent human being. Holding doors for strangers, saying good morning to someone you don’t know… just being nice in general. I cannot wrap my head around why you wouldn’t just be nice to someone. Sure, you might be having a bad day… but they could be too and sometimes a smile from someone you don’t know and a “here let me get that for you” while you open the door is all they need to turn that bad day around.
But I digress. So while, for the most part, I like to make logical decisions and do things of which I know the outcome (or the general outcome since you can’t control everything), there are times I’ve just gone with my gut for no other reason than going that route felt more right than going the logical route.
Take moving to Fayetteville the first time for example. I was offered a job one evening while I was out having drinks with the friend who wanted me to move in with him (we’ve been friends since high school and I was one of the few people he kept in pretty regular touch with) but that job required me to move down there in two weeks. Was it the smartest thing to quit my job and immediately move without setting up some sort of stability first? No, probably not. But it felt more right than passing on the job and staying in Lexington.
Well, now that I’ve had to move back to Lexington because that job fell through and I couldn’t find anything else to supplement, I realize it might have been the… incorrect way of going about it. But I still don’t think I would have changed it for the world. Who knows how things would have played out for me if I had waited to find another job? Something I was more qualified and familiar with. I might not have met Daniel and I don’t even want to imagine something like that.
But even then, that wasn’t the most recent time I trusted my gut. That moment would be the moment I decided to tell Daniel that I was interested in him instead of lying or reinforcing the fact that, at the time we met, I wasn’t looking for a relationship. When he asked if I was into him I paused a moment to try and figure out how to answer that. I’ve never been very good at hiding my interests. I don’t really see much of a point to it. So, I figured him asking was just so that he could be sure he wasn’t reading something incorrectly. I could have said no and we probably would have turned into that best friend team who are in love with each other but deny the other’s feelings whenever someone asks about it. Or I could have restated that I didn’t want a relationship without ever actually answering his question. Which, in my opinion, says more than enough.
But I didn’t do either of those things, because my gut told me to tell him what I was really thinking. So I did. And now here we are. I’m likely the happiest I’ve ever been in my entire life. Everyone can see it. At Thanksgiving dinner, my mother’s sister commented on how much happier I seemed. I just looked across the table, pointed at Daniel and said “you can blame him”.
So yes, the last time I followed my instincts it ended up being the right thing. But I believe that following your instincts is always the right thing, no matter what the outcome. Even if it doesn’t seem like the result was a good one, it happened for a reason. It happened because you needed to learn from it, you needed to grow. I could never regret moving to Fayetteville when I did even if it wasn’t the most financially responsible decision of my life, because that move brought me so much happiness that I wouldn’t trade it for the world.